Thursday, December 3, 2009

A Clean Slate

     Recently, my computer was infected by a virus, causing all my files to be deleted including RAW, PSD and High Resolution  images. All the photos that I have shot for the past year is now gone, all that's left are web quality images of them. Instead of viewing what happened as a downfall, I took as a Chance for a clean slate, A way to start over. I'm thinking that maybe this is not a bad thing after all, yes, previous works have been deleted, but because of what happened, I now have the chance to create a stronger portfolio which will showcase my work. And now I'm more driven to buid and improve my craft.

A new fight it is, I'm not giving up, I will never give up, this is what I love.. I'm gonna fight for it.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

As a Photographer

"Either I will find a way or I will make one."-Sir. Philip Sidney
"Either I will find a way or I will make one." - as of the moment I hold these words close to my heart. Everytime I feel weak and unable I utter these words, and like a magic pill, it boosts my morale. I know I've come a long way on my journey as an aspiring photographer, I've learn a lot of things and gain a lot of friends but often, I feel incontinent as if my talent is not up to par with others... I feel like I'm not growing or I'm not on the level that I should be.

It frustrates me when I feel like what I'm doing is not enough, or my knowledge is not enough and sometimes I wont sleep and try to lecture myself that I should become better, I should become stronger, its hard enough to doubt on other's capability and its even harder to doubt yourself...

5 months from now, I will celebrate my second year as an aspiring photographer, ahhh.. with all these pressure that I put over my shoulders, I always forget that I'm new in this field, I'm only two years in!! come to think about it, I've come a long way considering the amount of time I've been involve with my passion.

I guess I'm just hard on myself that i forget that I am new at this, I'm a baby when it comes to this, and it is somewhat pointless to compare myself to those who have been in this industry for a long time now. I need to cut myself some slack and know that in time, I will be as good if not better than those that I look up to.

One day I will find my way, if I'm not able to find one, I will make one! I will make it.. I will!! I just need to be patient, willing and open to possibilities and lessons along my way.